Smooth As Silk (SAS) is another one of My Skiing Buddies. In fact SAS is the person who had the dubious honour of assisting me on my first ever proper ski run.

Along with a few others who had issues with The Two Spherical Objects On Either Side Of The Nose, I had made my way to the picturesque Austrian Alpine town of Mayrhofen.

Once there I found myself forcing my feet into The Twin Monstrosities Known As Ski Boots (TTMKASB). I then attached TTMKASB to The Long Planks Known As Skis (TLPKAS) and I was duly on my way.

In a manner of speaking.

I seemed to spend the vast majority of that week flailing around on My Beloved Backside (MBB), wondering deeply about my sanity.

To his eternal credit, SAS is a patient man. He somehow managed to progress me from spending hour upon hour on MBB to the occasional fleeting moment or two when I experienced the beautiful freedom of skiing.

The bug had bitten. I was hooked, lined and sinkered.

I have been skiing for close on 20 years now and I can humbly say that finally I have some idea of what I am actually doing when I put on TLPKAS.

These days I meet up with up SAS on an annual basis. We catch up, share stories and sometimes allow a drop or two of the Local Life Enhancing Liquid to pass our lips. From time to time I have had the good fortune to ski again with SAS.

It’s always an education to observe his silky skis.